Banana
by anime-sparkle-party
Summary: When Kagami finds out something rather interesting in a biology class, how will he handle it, and will Aomine like it any better? - One-shot


"Listen kids! You better learn all this! It's all on the syllabus and will most definitely be on your Christmas exams!"

After their little victory in the winter cup, it was good bye basketball, and hello to studying. A lot of studying. But of course Kagami took no note to that as he sat in his biology class. He wasn't one to care about anything other than basketball, and it sure is hell would take quite a lot to make him change his mind. While Kuroko on the other hand, felt rather determined to do better in these tests. After being called average by his seniors, he felt quite idiotic, and felt as though he needed to opt his grades up.

"Right so um... Kagami! Explain to me something you have learnt today about DNA!" squealed the rather old biology teacher.

"Uh..." Kagami stared forward for a moment.

"I've learnt that every different being has different DNA!"

"We'll… Uh... That's a start... But well done… For you."

"Tsk"

"Kuroko! What does DNA stand for?"

"It stands for Deoxyribonucleic Acid," he said calmly, while feeling rather pleased with himself for remembering.

"Oh well done. I honestly didn't think you'd remember that!"

The bell suddenly rang.

"Oh there goes the bell! Don't remember to study! Oh! And does anyone want to hear a cool fact?!"

That one nerdy and actually interested kid suddenly yelled 'yeah' while the rest of the class just groaned as they packed up.

"Did you know that we share 50-60% of our DNA with bananas?!"

Suddenly Kagami stiffened.

"What did you say?" He asked a little shocked.

"I said humans share 50-60% of their DNA with bananas," the teacher repeated suddenly losing interest. Kagami gulped. Bananas?

_'What? How can such a strong and awesome guy like me share my body with a banana?! What?! That's impossible! A god damn banana! I'm too strong and talented to be compared to a banana! Oh my god I sound just like Aomine...'_

He sighed deeply as he took in the rather shocking information and prepared to leave the class. Kagami being a guy who didn't really understand much about science

"Kagami-kun,"

Kagami jumped.

"Oh, Kuroko. Hey,"

"Are you alright? You seem on edge suddenly,"

"Yeah I'm pissed off! How can I be compared to a banana! I'm too good at basketball to be compared to a banana!"

"He never compared you to a banana Kagami-kun. He just said we share DNA with one,"

"Yeah but that's basically the same thing!"

"Bakagami-kun," Kuroko said bluntly. Kagami deadpanned, before continuing to finally walk to basketball training.

The whole way to training he couldn't stop thinking about it.

_'What the hell?! I'm no banana! I'm a strong and good basketball player! I beat the Generation of Miracles! How can someone who beat the Generation of Miracles be compared to a banana?! Pfft that's just dumb,'_

"Yo Kagami!'

'Kagamicchi!'

'Kagami-kun,'

He shook out of his thought bubble to find the teams of Touou and Kaijo standing in the gym before him.

"Bakagami you looked like you were in thought. You shouldn't think too hard, it's not good for you," laughed Aomine.

"Shut up! Anyway, what are you doing here?"

"Our coaches decided it would be fun to train together for a change," Kasamatsu stated.

"Hm," Kuroko thought. "We'll come on Kagami-kun, we should get changed. Oh, uh do you guys need the locker rooms?" Kuroko asked the two teams.

"Please," said Kasamatsu.

"Yeah," said Imayoshi.

"Come then," Kuroko said as he began to walk towards the locker rooms.

After they had changed and were on the court doing stretches preparing for the tough work out, Kagami was still as frustrated as ever. He couldn't get that stupid banana comparison out of his head.

They were split into teams for training. He was in a team with Kasamatsu, Sakurai, Koganei and Aomine. Now I wonder who's gonna win these training matches huh?

They were finally playing, and were against Kise, as well as Kuroko, Wakamatsu, Furihata and Hyūga.

Kagami frowned and prepared to release all that pent up frustration he had from being compared to a stupid banana.

As soon as the whistle blew, Kagami straight away went for the ball. He grabbed and it quickly manoeuvred around Wakamatsu and Furihata. Then with all his might he jumped up, and harshly slammed the ball into the net. He landed on the ground and balled his fists.

_'__Dammit! That didn't work. I need something better! Stupid goddamn banana!'_

"Oi Bakagami what has your pants on fire?" asked Aomine as he walked towards him and raised an eyebrow.

"Shut up!" Kagami roared back.

"Ignore him Aomine-kun. Kagami-kun is just annoyed because he doesn't understand something,"

"Huh? What doesn't this idiot understand now?"

"Who are you calling an idiot Ahomine?!"

"You Bakagami!"

"Kagami-kun, Aomine-kun, calm down,"

"Just tell me what the hell is wrong with this idiot now,"

Kuroko sighed.

"Our biology teacher told us that humans share 50-60% DNA with bananas, and Bakagami here took it too seriously and said he didn't like being compared to a banana,"

"And are you saying he shouldn't be mad about that?" Aomine yelled suddenly, "What the hell?! How dare they compare us to a banana?! How dare they compare _me_ to a banana?!"

Kuroko stopped breathing for a moment before he realised the mistake he just made.

_'__Oh yeah, Aomine-kun is the same type of idiot as Kagami-kun…'_

"Aomine-kun that's not what that means,"

"Don't bullshit me Tetsu! You're just making fun of me!"

"Aomine-kun please-"

"Shut up Tetsu!"

Kuroko stared at the two fuming aces in front of him. Oh this is just great… There was nothing worse than seeing two hot headed morons being hot headed about the same thing in the same room.

"Who the hell does that biology teacher thing he's saying?!" screamed Aomine.

"It's a woman," said Kuroko.

"And who the hell even thought of that?! Have they ever even met us?!" yelled Kagami.

Everyone else in the other teams just stared at the two teens. They didn't know if they should be afraid that they might accidentally bust a vein from anger, or if they should face palm at their stupidity. The two teens really were stupid, but only now did the rest of Seirin, Kaijo and Touou realise just _how_ stupid they really were. Seirin had seen Kagami terrifyingly low grades before, what with him having the uncanny ability to get a 0 in a test, this little fiasco still somewhat surprised them.

"DNA…" said Imayoshi quietly before sighing deeply, "The shit we put up with I swear…"

"Bakagamicchi, Ahominecchi…" sighed Kise.

All of the players silently began to turn around and walk back to the benches until the two aces calmed down a bit from their banana rage. Of course everyone knew that might take a while, what with Kagami being that slow, and Aomine being that full of himself.

"I am the best! You can't compare the best with a banana!"

"Talk for yourself! I've had to bear this far longer than you so I don't know what you're so mad about!"

"You two shut up!"

Kagami and Aomine suddenly froze and turned around to find Riko and Momoi glaring down at them. They gulped and stepped back a bit.

"Now listen here you dumbasses!" yelled Riko.

"Sit down we're going to give you one damn good of a biology lesson!" yelled Momoi.

Kagami and Aomine shivered before quickly sitting down on the ground, attention fully on the two females before them.

"You morons have no idea what DNA means so I'll try to keep it simple. And don't forget it! I've had plenty of tests on this stuff so you better pay a lot of god damn attention! DNA is a molecule that contains the genetic code of organisms!" lectured Riko as she glared at the two idiots in front of her.

"And the biology teacher said that humans share 50-60% of their DNA with bananas, it does not mean we are comparing you to a god damn banana, it's just saying your DNA is similar to one! Your genetic code says you are human you assess! You are NOT being compared to bananas!" finished Momoi.

Aomine and Kagami stared forward. They were still a tad pissed about it, and that hadn't exactly cleared stuff up for them, but if it would stop the two females from looking at them like they were about to murder them, then they would stop their raging until they got home.

"Do you understand?!" they both yelled.

Kagami and Aomine quickly nodded and stood up.

"Good!" yelled at the aces making them flinch, and stormed off muttering stuff like 'Ahomine' and 'Bakagami'.

Kise stared intensely as he listened in. Then an idea popped into his head and he turned to Kasamatsu.

"Wait! So when they said that we share 50-60% of our whatever with bananas, does that mean that there could be people here that are 10% more banana than others?"

Everyone stared at Kise before narrowing their eyes.

"NOT YOU TOO BAKA!" yelled Kasamatsu as he planted a solid kick into Kise's backside.


End file.
